Marriage should be an absolutely joyful time in your life. If you have got engaged and you are looking to get married soon, there are some conversations you absolutely must have. If you don’t then you might find that you’re actually not on the same page as a couple which can lead to friction. Instead, try to make sure you are both clear on expectations.
How Are We Going to Pay For The Wedding
In some very traditional families, the wedding is paid for by the bride’s family, but this is usually only the case in wealthy families and there is every chance that this offer won’t be extended to you.
So, it is time to make a plan of how you are going to save and budget for the wedding, and you both may already have some savings that you are willing to put towards it, but a conversation about who will be contributing will make things clearer.
What Are Our Spending and Savings Habits
You may not fully understand each others’ savings and spending habits when you don’t have access to one another’s financial affairs, but when you get married you might become closer in this regard. Work out whether you are both good at saving, and how tight your monthly spending is, before you decide what kind of wedding you want and how you are going to handle your finances.
How Will We Plan for Emergencies
Sadly, emergencies happen. Someone might lose their earning power or even become very unwell, so it is very reasonable to make a plan for these kinds of scenarios.
Create a Will
It’s a sensible idea to make a will with the help of an estate planning lawyer to ensure that any money left behind will be given to the other person or any children you need to look after in the event of your passing.
Appoint a Financial Power of Attorney
If you are not able to make financial decisions, who is going to do it for you? A financial power of attorney makes perfect sense, so you should add this to your will and make sure you have followed the legal steps to bring it into action.
Consider Getting a Life and Disability Insurance
Life insurance policies can pay for your house or for other commitments if you should pass away, and though it isn’t a nice discussion for couples to have, it makes sense to know that you are covered should one of you pass away, or become disabled. Policies can be relatively straightforward to obtain, too.
How Can You Each Maintain Some Money Independence
It is perfectly reasonable to chat about how you can both still have your own money. It doesn’t all have to go into one pot. Consider both contributing to a joint account but also keeping some money for your own purposes and spending on yourself if you want.
Risk Tolerance and Financial Goals
You may want to invest or take some financial risks, especially while you are young. Have this discussion together, as this is the only way you will know what you are comfortable with. If one of you wants to start a business, you want to know that the other is on board.
How Will We Divide Financial Responsibilities
Who is responsible for what expense? What comes under a joint responsibility? You may have a joint account for your bills and for things around the house. For example, if you want to buy a car or a new lawnmower for the garden, or something for the kitchen, it would go out of the joint account. If you want to buy new trainers this might come out of your own money.
Are We going to Combine Bank Accounts or Keep Them Separate?
Think about your different accounts and whether it makes sense to combine them or to each keep them separate. With the age of online banking upon us it is pretty easy to have multiple accounts, so you could each have a checking account and you can also have a joint account.
However, you are both comfortable doing things is fine. If you figure that you are both contributing and should have access to the same money then there is not necessarily any harm in having one pot, but not everyone is comfortable with this. It’s a definite conversation to have.
Debts and Credit History
If you have any debts or a poor credit history then these could impact upon your partner. They might even be responsible for your debt if you can’t repay it so before marrying you need to discuss this and make sure you both know where you stand.
How should we prioritize retirement savings?
Are you thinking carefully about the future and what it entails? Do you have a 401K or other plan for your retirement?
Talk about how you might put money to one side for a rainy day. Investing in property is often a sensible way to ensure you have some money behind you, or you can choose to create other retirement plans and savings accounts for the future.
These are definitely discussions to have as a couple. You are planning to have a long and happy life together, so you need to know what you are going to do in retirement, and how you are planning to pay to get by.